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Bad Knees

I've been reworking this post for awhile now and I thought I finally got it but LITERALLY in the middle of typing this I got some news that blew my mind and is tangentially related to this and another post I'm working on. Anyway....

I'm 33 and all my friends are grown-ups.
Me? Not so much.

I mean, I'm an adult in the fact that I can easily be convicted of crimes, I have to pay taxes when I work, my knees hurt from vigorous activity and, no matter how much I pray for it, I'm not going to grow any taller. And I got a lot of gray hair now so if you see me you'd probably say "Hey. That guy is a grown-up."
Ehh, that's only kind of true or, to be honest, was true a few times in the past. I have definitely had "grown-up moments" where I was paying full rent, cable, fixing the water heater, driving around, having a real bank account, etc. Currently, this is not my reality.

Example- I went to my 10 year college reunion (JEEZ!) in 2011. I didn't want to go initially but a)I'm always up for free booze and b)I usually succumb to peer pressure from multiple friends. So, I went and fun was had. We went and did juvenile stuff for a day and did a chorus version of  "Scenario" by A Tribe Called Quest which left us out of breath and me and my guy friends murdered a meal at a Cracker Barrel. So, good times for all.

But while I was enjoying myself with my old pals, I was also looking around. These people were mature adults. I was a fancy teenager. They had kids, were working on Master's degrees, were talking about weddings and mortgages and vacations they earned for committing to one line of work for years. What astounded me wasn't that some of these people were doing these; some of these folks were adult-ish in college. What shocked me was the fact that the jackanapes who I prank called people with and the girls who drank 40s of Olde English with were succeeding in their lives and were in charge of now taking care of the lives of others. It was amazing.

I don't know this girl but she'll probably raise children one day.

More amazing- my close friends, the people I've known since sixth grade through college, are also adults. They are married, have kids, houses and are accomplished. I have a pal that worked on Obama's reelection campaign, one saving people from subway trains, others who know "the people who run the world" and even two friends that have just had their film optioned after taking it to Sundance.

I'm writing this from a chair in my grandmother's house on her computer above the basement where I live and am underemployed. So, yeah. There's a difference.

And it's not that I envy my friends (I'm VERY happy for them) or that I even want their lives (I REALLY don't); I've just been unsure of my own path to adulthood. I know you can't follow anyone else's road, especially when you want to live a creative life, but it would be nice to see myself in the mirror as a mature functioning member of society more. I know that there are certain steps to do this and I will eventually get to where I'm going. It's just hard to look back at the start of that race where we all were and realizing that my silly mistakes, regretful decisions and "hippy living", as one of my pals put it, has me lagging a bit.

Yeah, we all have our race to run and you shouldn't measure your life against the lives of others but it's hard when you have surrounded yourself with awesome. But maybe I should take that as a positive sign. Like attracts like and maybe my awesome moments are still to come.

No.

They are DEFINITELY still to come and I will be an adult in more than hair color and body aches very soon.

Random Subway Thinking Thought

We are indifferent towards strangers, very nice to people we like and sometimes horrible to people we say we love. The latter occurs mostly because we take those who we can constantly depend on for granted. We hopefully grow out of it as we get older but some o u don't.

I need this dude to back up off me on this rain. See? That's actually treating a stranger more than indifferent. GROWTH!!!

2013

That is all.

TEN

Ten Random Things I Like (at this exact moment)-
just to get the blog writing muscles back up to snuff

1)LESBIANS- 

I know. I know. You are probably thinking "Pssstt. Typical guy." But trust me. My putting lesbian ladies on this list is not sexual in nature. And I also don't mean ALL lesbians. There is no one group that I'm totally cool with. That's weird. I do find myself enjoying chilling with lesbians more than hanging with gay dudes though. This is not a knock against the gay dudes I do hang with; I love y'all it's just I'm on the same page when I hang with ladies that like ladies. I don't have to impress them and their is no weirdness there....
Except for Hannah Hart. I think I have a crush on her and that might get strange.

I'd butter yo shit, girl...

2)IRISH PUBS- 

I miss McMullan's in Vegas.

I refer you to my other blog and my love of drinking and camaraderie. Irish pubs provide that 90% of the time. And if some awkward moment pops up, I'm less likely to Hulk out if I'm enjoying myself with a fine ale.

3)RUDE GIRLS- 

Damn, B!

I'm from New York City. I grew up in a neighborhood with tough girls and they were quicker to read you the riot act than in other areas. I'm familiar with their ways. They are also easier to read if they like you.

4)NICE LADIES- 

Okay, I know I JUST said I like rude girls but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate nice ladies. Nice people are awesome and when they smell good and have lady parts? That's even better. They confuse me but I at least know the confusion is coming from a good place.

5)90s MUSIC(or at least 90s HIP-HOP)- 

Quick. Turn on a radio.
Sucks, right?
All older generations say it but I'm finding that it's proving to be true- "Music now blows. The music I listened to as I grew up is much better." It probably mostly comes from the fact that the music is connected with experiences I had that help mold me into who I am today but.....nah. Music was just better. There is no possible way that you should have a party with crappy tunes if you have access to, at the bare minimum, 1990s era hip-hop.

These dudes could give you an hour of good music alone.

6)99¢ SLICE- 

Lint, ling, ahhh! Four quarters. FOOD TIME!!!

Recessionista life. Only thing better? 75¢ SLICE

7)BAD NEIGHBORHOODS- 

Home.

I'm not talking about "dangerous, Chief Keef's cousin will shoot you in the face" areas. I'm referring to neighborhoods where if you are from the outside looking in or just follow what the news say about it, you'd think it was a bad neighborhood. Usually, if you visit someone that lives there, you'll find out that it really isn't horrible and most people are just trying to live their existence in peace and are on the same pursuit for the American Dream. I also find these areas to be more community like. They are generally accepting of more types of people, particularly when I compare it to certain upscale neighborhoods. They are far more welcoming.

8)BEACHES/POOLS/BBQ- 

Really just an excuse to post a pic of a wet Carrie Keagan.

I have found that less clothes usually equals less BS. (Except with too much testosterone and alcohol is involved but, really, isn't that everything?)

9)FALL- 

Yessir.

I don't just like Fall. I LOVE Fall. The weather, the fact that I can rock hoodies, the variation of colors. FACT- Fall is a cooler, sexier version of Spring.

10)SCI-FI(some fantasy)- 

I guess I just like the ideas of other realities besides this one. The whole "best of all possible worlds" scenario seems like BS to me particularly after watching the news for a little while. I think we all need that other universe to escape to sometimes.

Evolve to meet your future.